Tuesday, October 13, 2015

A little poetry...

Medicine Dance

Wild mind
Sweating body
Detox
Detox
Cleanse on a cellular level
Still the mind and
Vibrate the body
Dance from the inside out and
Break the moulds
Break the splints
The restraints
The masks that
Keep you captive
Passive
Unwilling to look into
The eyes of another
Fear of reflection
Rejection
Fear of and longing for
The same thing
Wholeness
Oneness


Aya
Cradled like a baby
Growing, expanding
Intertwined
Connected, communicating
Shower of vibrations
Scanning, reading, seeing
All I have ever been
All I could ever be
Already inside of me
Surrounding me
Warm womb
Infinite, everlasting

Sunday, October 11, 2015

Lessons on release and surrender

I have decided to write a short blog post on the most profound lesson I have learned while being in Peru. For one reason or another, I have been taught this lesson over and over again these past two months. I find it amazingly profound and frustratingly simple and it is: No matter what I am struggling with or what my current "issue" is, no matter what question I am asking the Universal powers that be, the answer is always the same: Get out of your own way, Bethany and surrender!

Not sure what path to take? Frustrated? Angry? Things not going "right" or "as planned"? Lost? Insecure? No worries.... Just get out of your own way and surrender! Now, I know just as well as everyone else that just because something is simple doesn't mean that it is easy.....oh heck no! But this, like most things, become easier with practice.

Trapped in your head? Thoughts running amok down a frighteningly familiar and disastrous path? Emotions consuming you? Banging your head against a wall? Crawling out of your skin?  EXCELLENT! Well done, friend! You have reached a point of change and growth! :) You are being given a most excellent opportunity to release those old thoughts/patterns/emotions that are no longer serving you. They are arising because they are ready to be released. A lesson is ready to be learned, a transformation is ready to be made! Get out of your own way by taking a few deep breaths, relaxing, and coming to your center. Then surrender by releasing your attachment to whatever it is that was consuming you. Thank it for being there, for teaching you the lesson, and for releasing. I find it is easiest to receive this lesson when I am in a quiet space, preferably in nature. While at the Temple, I learned a tool to aid in this process of release called Ho o'pono pono (some people may know it as zero limits). Now, I in no way claim to be an expert on Ho o'pono pono. It was taught to me in a 1.5 hour class at the Temple but I can say that I have used it MANY time since then and it friggin works! So, even though this blog has taken a different course than I originally thought and probably stopped being "short" a couple of paragraphs ago, I would like to share this tool with you :)

Ho o'pono pono has 4 basic steps. I have added a 5th that I find helpful and the facilitator that taught it to me also added a step so I guess my version has 6 basic steps :) But first, the setup: Once you become aware of the issue at hand find some time where you can be alone, preferably in nature. Get comfortable and try to connect with the thought/emotion/pattern. I believe that they are their own entity with their own energy so instead of getting lost in it again try to just see it as its own being. Often, I like to ask why it is here.....does it have something to teach me? Sometimes it does, sometimes it is just ready to be released. Sit for as long as you feel you need to to get an answer or lesson and then proceed to the steps. If nothing comes simply proceed to the steps. The steps are actually a conversation (don't worry, you don't have to speak it aloud...in your mind is fine haha).
1) I love you: This might feel weird but this step is about more than love, it is about recognition and acknowledgement. In this step you are recognizing and acknowledging its existence and loving it for being there.
2) I'm sorry: There may be something or someone you feel you owe an apology to but not always. For me, this step is often apologizing to the thought/feeling/behavior for holding onto it and imprisoning it for so long....in other words, for my attachment to it.
3) Please forgive me: For what you apologized for in step #2
4) Thank you: For the lessons it taught you, for being with you and serving you when you needed it (because some part of you did) and also for coming to your awareness to let you know that it is no longer serving you and is ready to be released.
5) I now set you free: This is the step that I added. I personally believe that permission is powerful so I give the thought/emotion/pattern my permission to be free. It shows intent and is something that I feel is important.
6) Have no expectation to the outcome whatsoever: This is the step the facilitator who taught me added and I agree with him. When you set it free, really set it free. Free to stay or go. Free. No expectations or attachments.

Then get up and go about your day. I have found that about 9 times out of 10 the thought/emotion/pattern releases immediately. Seriously! I have also found that if it does not choose to release that it is still there for a reason. Usually I still have something to learn from it so I go through the steps again. This time I pay special attention to the prep time and really give myself space to learn why it has come to my awareness. There was one time when I had to do it 3 times. Each time there was a different lesson. Triple score!!! :)

Remember: Everything is happening FOR you, not TO you.

Cheers ya'll and happy Ho o'pono ponoing :)

Saturday, October 10, 2015

Integration and living like a local

Well, friends, I am back in the city after two more plant dietas. I greeted the city with equal parts exhaustion and excitement! After two months of medicine work I was in need of a break...a real break that lasts longer than a couple of days. I was feeling squeaky clean, centered, and grounded but also depleted. I needed rest...and food! I also felt that I needed some down time to integrate all of the work that had been done. I could feel it circling over my head in a holding pattern just waiting for me to settle down and be still long enough for it to land. Well, even though I new this, I didn't give myself the gift of being still. I had friends, old and new, who were in the city for the week and I was so excited to connect, chat, and eat and so that is what I did (I also rested but not enough). Well, by the end of the week I felt ill. So, back to Tess's I went and she cleaned all of the toxic city stuff out that I had accumulated that week and it became so clear to me that I needed to take this integration period more seriously. What to do? Only two things were clear: 1) I was not ready to go back to the medicine 2) I was not ready to go back home.  I knew I needed more integration time but how much? So I sat with myself for a bit and what came to me is that the hotel/restaurant lifestyle was not working for the integration and also, it was getting expensive! It was time to live like a local and do normal, local people things. I needed to stop living out of my suitcase and start making smoothies. So, I looked for an apartment and found one that met my needs. I have a clean room, a small kitchen, A/C, Wi-Fi and a bistro table outside by the gardens. I have keys to my very own space! What a gift! My very own sanctuary in this crazy city :)

I am excited to see what this month brings and how the medicine work will integrate. I never thought I would find myself renting an apartment here but this is what has unfolded so I am rolling with it. Next stop: Who knows? I am currently in a space of infinite possibility! <3